First Decade with Lyme

 Ten Years Today!

On this day, ten years ago was when my life changed and I learned what it meant to be seriously ill. I broke my arm, had lyme in my body (unknowingly) and my health spiraled from there on out.

UNTIL I went to the lyme clinic in Kansas. Today, I feel like I am just as happy and just as able bodied as before I was sick. I feel great, I do all kinds of activities these days. Im still pushing at the gym, even though progress is slow. I go to visit my soon-to-be graduate school this weekend to see where Ill be living for the next four years of my life starting in April. 

I have a lot to look forward too outside of my health these days. Not every lyme patient is given this fortunate of an opportunity to move on with their life. I still take supplements, I take some things for autoimmune and for methylation and sleep. Which may seem like a lot, but considering these items work well enough that one skipped day makes me feel different, I feel like they count for a lot. 

I had a set of labs done in mid December 2020, my ANA was checked (autoimmune factors) plus standard CBC and lipids. I still have no cholesterol, that one stumps my lyme doctor to no end. He's given me stuff for my stomach/gallbladder/liver and changed things over and over and my body refuses to make cholesterol. My ANA is going down, its at the lowest it can be without being negative-which is fantastic. ANA may never test negative again, but as long as I feel well and the markers are rock bottom I do not really have anything to care about. I take two Apex Energetics products, Trizomal Glutathione and Nitric Balance and personally I think those two items are what have pushed my autoimmune down to a safe level. I still have kept on a regular dose on these two items, I have yet to drop down to a maintenance dose.

I run pretty hard, between my mildly questionable sleep schedule, work stress (recently quit my job of 5.5 years-but thats a story for another day), projects, the gym, planning for grad school and having a social life-I don't keep much down time. I enjoy staying busy because I was not able to for so long in my life. BUT with this, comes a price, I have  to take care of my body. I have to take my vitamins, I have to put myself in bed by a decent time in the evening, and I have to limit junk food. I also have to manage stress (people without chronic illness could be doing better in this category too!). If I stay consistent with these items I feel great and life is good. 

Yes I still have occasional days where I am not motivated and I do not want to do anything, but I attribute it to running hard more so than lyme. I do not have aches and pains associated with lyme, dizziness has been gone forever. 

Ten years ago, if someone said I was one day going to be going to chiropractic school to become a doctor because I had struggled with pain and disease for so long I wouldn't have believed it. I wanted to do some sort of sports, I wanted to get a degree in marine biology after high school. Instead I am going an entirely different direction in my life and I love it. 

I look back and this time has gone by so quickly, but I have not forgotten how terrible some of it was. I remember a few years ago how painful my anxiety and OCD was, that time period feels like it lasted forever. I was seriously afraid that would never end, that was a nightmare and nothing more. The early years with lyme, I spent trying to convince my parents and doctors that I had lyme and what having lyme meant. That was a long process in itself, its a complicated disease to explain to someone whose never had this sort of health issue. I am convinced, through my uncountable conversations with others about health, that lyme and co-infections are a category all in their own. Its not like cancer, it can be similar to autoimmune disease but at the same time it can be the cause of autoimmune, its different from thyroid disorders, its not even close to diabetes-just for some examples. 

I have so so much to be grateful for, my teachers, especially my psych teachers in college. They taught me so much on what it means to be able to manage stress and why its important. My whole journey has taught me about being compassionate and caring for others. 

Im glad im going into the next decade feeling like I have a sturdy ground to stand on, and I have God to thank for that more than anything else. 

Kansas 2020

Last week I was back in Kansas! 

At this point this has become rather a routine, we check in and speak to everyone and talk for a while. Then at some point we go back and see the doctor. Our rental car this time is a bright orange Jeep Wrangler, which is exactly what my doctor drives except his isn't as bright of a... traffic cone orange.

Day 1

 The doctor went over all my many test results and overall was very impressed, I did not really lose any progress since I was last there seven months ago which is a very big deal. Only one thing was a concern on my blood work, my liver enzymes were elevated by a lot, he gave me a few things to take and in a month I will get those rechecked back at home. We could not figure out why my liver could have changed so much. He said my kidneys look perfect for the first time ever, he said for someone with chronic illness to have normal kidney results, is a big deal and its a sign my body is getting back to normal. When the kidneys do not have to over work to maintain baseline minimum, its a good sign!

My thyroid also looked great. No issues there.  After looking at everything he focused on my gut issues, my liver, and a few other things for the week. I had a few odd things out of my usual pattern show up on my blood work that we are going to try to figure out. Overall I am setup for great improvement, through the "grading system" that he has me use to track my symptoms and severity, I need my number to be 50 or lower. Last time it was 80 something, this time it was 68. He said this means I am getting closer to being done with coming to the clinic! The lower the number the better.

 

Day 2

Today the doctor talked to me more about my blood test results. He said due to the recent viral outbreak the lab has released some webinars for the doctors to watch on recognizing viral infections (as a whole), he gave me a list of things that are typically altered when one is sick with a virus. Then he told me the list of things that were off on my blood test, guess what they matched. I had the blood draw on the day I got sick with a virus last week, so he further confirmed that the odd things on my tests were probably due to a viral infection, even the liver enzymes. Considering I no longer have a viral infection, this is all good news.

He worked on inflammation, a fungal issue showing up, and some gut things to further remediate the issues with my body. As a whole he is still pretty happy with how my tests are turning out!

Day 3+4

Yesterday the doctor spent time checking out why my body had so much inflammation, he gave me something to take for inflammation and specifically inflammation in my gut. He's balanced out sensitivities towards mold and some other environmental pollutants that I could come into contact with. 

Today he mainly focused on my gut, for several months I had been eating a lot more and gaining weight. In the last month that has gone away and Im back to not eating except what I have to. He's really focusing on trying to fix that. He added in a few things for my gut, interestingly the stuff he gave me isn't necessarily digestion boosters like digestive enzymes. The supplements are for my gallbladder and for preventing my body from producing too much leptin (hunger suppressing hormone). So the eating issue appears to be partly a hormonal issue rather than a diet or a malfunction. Learn something new every day. 

He went over my updated test results for today, and for the most part my body is working better. The body systems he's trying to support and improve the function of, were reflected in the results-meaning treatment is working as planned.

He told me today, that we had to treat parasites for so long, there would be some gut problems to clean up after. Well the parasites are gone and have been gone, this is the cleanup of the aftermath. After that, he doesn't think there will be anything or much left wrong that I will need treated for!

Day 5

The final day was short and simple as usual, he did some more work for my gut and added another couple supplements. He adjusted my spine so I could be prepared for the flight home, and we socialized for a little bit talking about alternative medicine things as a whole. I like getting his perspective on things and seeing what his experience is with different supplements. Last year we took a family trip to Hawaii (sounds great right?) and the flight there (10hrs) completely wore me out for the whole time we were there and I didnt really enjoy it because I was running on empty the whole time. He suggested that I try a megadose of glutathione before going on a big trip and continue to take it during the trip. He said he does the same and he holds up well. 

So, for now I am on a whole new set of supplements! Making progress and creating positive changes. My body is thankfully (for the most part LOL) not what it used to be! Things are starting to work like they are supposed to and I am becoming more and more human. 

I have a few more things to write but for now, I think this covers the biggest changes!

Reflecting on The Waves

Reflecting on a Week of Changes
This week has been a unique time in my life. One, because some things in my work/personal life are changing. Two, because I am headed back to Kansas this weekend. Heading to Kansas is always a guarantee that my life will change, I go in feeling one way and come out on the other side feeling different (usually worn out). Then weeks and months later my life continues to change.

Ill start elaborating. Personal life-
An amazing coworker of mine, that is a cross between a mom and a best friend to me, is leaving our office to move to Virginia. This woman came in only a year ago, and cleaned house. She changed our entire work environment. She streamlined all of our systems, wrote protocols, held people accountable, increased business, and most importantly brought a smile to everyones face.
It is nothing short of a God send that this woman was placed in our office and our lives. She managed to remove all of the toxic personalities from our office and environment, so all this posts from the last two years or so about issues with coworkers-she solved six months ago. Thanks to her, I am able to go to work and enjoy it. My heart is back in it, life is good. I also gained confidence and value in myself, I have been shown how much I am worth to the business. I have held the position of professional multitasker for four years now, thanks to this woman my benefit has been recognized and I can see a higher value in myself in the office.
The amount of smiling patients that come into our office has increased, many came by today or this week to say goodbye We even had a surprise party earlier in the week and managed to surprise her, I was honored to be a big part of that. I like making sure people feel special, I think that day we all did a good job.
This person has actually been special enough to me, that today I gave her a link to this blog as a going away present. For those of you who have been reading for a long time, you know that this blog is a very secret safe haven of mine, that I have only given to a small handful of people. The first being a coworker last year, then E and one other girl friend of mine, and now this coworker. Thats only 4 people (unless I forgot someone).

Personal life Pt. 2
I have been thinking lately on how much my life has been on a continuously changing spin cycle for the last few years, especially since the strep infection in my brain. The anxiety and depression has subsided substantially since March. Looking back into October 2018, anxiety was hitting an all time high and I was collapsing. I was scared big time and answers were scarce. I wanted to crawl out of my skin, so many nights I was awake in bed praying that I could just stand up right out of my body and leave it behind. My body and I are on better speaking terms, it still has some catching up to do, but I thank God every day today for the body I have been given. The good, the bad, and the ugly. A few years back I had zero understanding of anxiety, now I get it.

Ya know, they don't say you "get it" until you GET IT. Thankfully, I GET IT now. I understand.

Anxiety is a complete and total change in mental capacity and functions, immediately. Sometimes its triggered and sometimes its a surprise. Ive had a few minor surprises lately with it, but all very minor and all very related to staying up too late or not sleeping. A year ago I couldn't stand to be in my own skin, good day or bad. I wanted out. It didnt feel right.
Two years ago I remember having plenty of vegetable moments, all too often just being too tired to do much. Hobbies weren't in the picture. Depression was made, and anxiety showed up.
Three years ago, I was only a few months into treatment with my doctor, and that was my first taste of feeling human again. Depression was frequent but not severe, anxiety was very mild or maybe non existent (I would have to check my notes).
Six years ago, I had to take time off school because I just couldn't function.
Seven years ago I had to recognize that my life had changed, from an event the year prior, and I would have to recognize my new life style of feeling unwell all the time "for no reason". All sports were dropped and any activity I could live without was left to the dust and never thought of as a possibility. Life had changed and the future was a scary place.

The future is happening, life has been ever changing. More scary changes than I care to think about, but all the changes have led to the person I have become. In the last few months, since my last visit to Kansas, I have come to appreciate the man I am becoming. I am flawed, my body is faulty, things still scare me, sometimes I dont know what Im doing. But this is the life God gave me, it wasn't an accident, it all has a purpose for his glory. Ive made it this far, if I was doing something that wrong God would have taken me out of the picture. I will be here to serve my purpose until God decides my time has come.

Personal Life Pt. 3
I have removed a lot of toxic people from my life in the last few months. I used to fear that I was being antisocial, and that I should be conforming to other peoples quirks and habits otherwise I was doing something wrong. Now I am realizing that those behaviors put me in situations that allowed me to be walked on and taken advantage of, and a lot of those "friends" may serve me better from a distance rather than on my speed dial. Some of these friends have known me for  along time, they may come back around and this may be a temporary change, or it may be time to forget about them. My "best" friend that I used to mention on a frequent basis has been MIA from my life since February. One day he didn't text me back, and I never heard from him again. Very long story short, I sent him an email asking for forgiveness for whatever I may have done, and I apologized for some of my own faults that I knew bothered him. That was the end of that. Sending that email hurt, I had to pour a lot of emotion and thought into it and I knew in my heart that nothing would come of it physically. I knew no matter what I said, was he going to respond. God has given me very strong intuition in my life, sometimes I "just know". But I said my piece, I put it out there, I got it all of my  chest, I asked for forgiveness, I asked God to forgive me for my mistakes-known and unknown.
After this event my life began to clear in a way, I started getting him off my mind. It hurt. It burned. Intuition says its not over and come the end of this year I need to be prepared for something, what that is-I dont know. I just know I should take note of what my intuition said.
I removed 90% of the things that kept my life anchored to this person in anyway, which consisted of deleting pictures from my phone, texts, and taking of the friendship ring that he gave me. One day I will dump that last 10%, which will be when I delete all of the pictures and messages, throw the ring away (turns out it cost like $10 on eBay, I found where he bought it on the first search, he probably put very little thought into it and it probably isn't worth keeping in my drawer), and take the one last picture off my dresser. Its just hard for me to part with memories that during a hard part of my life, brought me a lot of joy and relief from some painful realities. I havent decided if its intuition telling me to hold onto these things a little longer, or just sentiment.

This isn't the only friend Ive had incidence with this year, probably the most dramatic. One "best" friend started dating another " best" friend, then the two of them starting treating myself and others rather poorly. Another "great" friend of mine started dating a new guy, then said new guy got a bit handsy with the girls cousin in the pool. "Great" friend says it didnt happen, cousin gets upset. Lo and Behold, house divided on a rather serious matter there. I voiced my opinion and stepped out of the picture. Anyway, ill stop there with the drama, drama doesn't need to seem like its being glorified.
This year, I realized how much healthier and happier I was when I didnt go out with friends or spend an evening with certain people. I noticed that I was happier stressing over car parts, than I was being caught in drama which began to seem endless. Maybe right now I am feeling a bit antisocial and I am being a bit snobby about what quality of people I want to spend my time around. I think it may be time I start treating my social life with a little more respect, even if it means staying home and not being social.

Lyme-
I guess I could mention a little bit about the topic that gave me the reason to write my blog. Life is going well in the disease department. Sleep has struggled painfully this week, but I have had a lot on my mind. I have had some extremely severe leg cramps all day everyday for the last several days which have made it painful to walk, I'm blaming this on working on my car. Fatigue and motivation are a bit of a struggle, probably related to sleeping.
If I could sleep well, and wake up early, then maintain a consistent schedule indefinitely, I think my symptoms would continuously improve. The one thing that  does remain a struggle is my personality, I still do not feel like im as "awake" as I was pre strep, sometimes it is still very difficult to talk. My brain just stays at flatline. I used to talk a lot more and joke around a lot and everyone thought I was hilarious (which is still there, but not at all like before. I used to keep track of my jokes I had so many). Its coming back, maybe after this coming visit to Kansas this will begin to take a large turn for the best. Im praying for my body as an entirety to heal and function properly (not just function "enough"), Im praying that my brain fog will be lifted, that I will feel completely like myself again and not just a "part" of myself that survived a war, and Im praying that I will be given the energy and stamina to feel GREAT after this coming week all the way through the school year (or further). Last time, my doctor told me I had near miraculous results with how quickly and significantly my test results improved for the better. I am praying that this will be gloriously repeated.

How am I doing on making up for the lost time I was in hiatus?? I told you, thoughts are in there!!

A Weekend With A Side of +Rest

On The Bright Side 
You know how they say the sun will come out tomorrow? Even when its been raining for weeks and weeks? Turns out there may be a sliver of truth in that. This weekend my sun came out :)
Ive slept well the last 2-3 nights and felt relaxed. No sign of anxiety or panic attacks. No shaking. No random fear of something I wouldn't normally fear. I even worked on some things I haven't had the energy to work on.

I felt peace

I had really come to miss this feeling and now I remember why. I have lot more energy and a lot more positive thought when my mind is at ease!! I had forgotten what it was like to not feel a vortex going through my mind. I started yet another new supplement last week called NeuroCalm by Designs for Health, it may be whats helping my brain relax and only go 0-60 instead of 0-90.
I find supplements can help my brain for a while but usually there will come a time they no longer help. Its a waiting game to see if I hold this nice peaceful feeling for the longterm or if this weekend was a nice God given break.
Even if I stay feeling this well I will still be seeing the new doctor next month. The doctor can find out why and what else to do to fix it instead of control it.

But boy it is a nice feeling to sleep hard, dream, wake up, and feel the new day
I usually sleep about as well as a dog speaks english. Just doesn't happen. SO my day usually feels about like a week, because I never feel the reset of sleep. So allllll those days of the week really just feel like one extra long day.
To wake up and feel reset AND refreshed....I forgot this feeling. Completely forgot. The last few days have been nice!
I can already feel that I won't be awake much longer tonight. Normally when I night blog its a sign of an impending loooong night.

But hey theres more!
I had the energy and brain cells to work on my car! And enjoy it! I did run out of steam but I didn't care because I had the steam to do it in the first place!
I had a great conversation on the phone today with my best friend and he gave me some good news that I had been praying for all week, and truthfully thought I would be praying for for an extended or potentially indefinite amount of time. He's going through a lot right now and this week was a truck load, but good things are getting closer for him. He just doesn't see it yet (no he doesn't read my blog so this isn't my secret way of sneaking in encouraging words into his mind LOL).
School work too, Ive gotten some things done early and Ive been able to work hard (or at least feel like I am working hard) on some homework and studying.

I have been dreaming a lot lately. Living off in space in a world I wish existed. Sometimes I see this world as my goal for when I can do more than just the average daily living. Other days I see this dream as only a dream. Today my dreams seem more real, like it really can be possible to sleep at night, wake up with a smile, enjoy going to work, enjoy going to school, make new friends, and get back into some things I thought were long gone.
I did some stretching today with a friend of mine, her and I had a blast hanging out. She's a recovered depressed person who has recently started making her life what she wants it to be. She's been a close friend with me for the last year and a half. Today we both got to enjoy life together and that was a nice feeling and a fun adventure.

Exercise is one thing I do long to get back to. I miss stretching and gymnastics, its been seven years or so since Ive done either. I do stretch myself on the floor every so often but rarely in any significance. If the new clinic can help my brain out and I can finally get closer to the end of my Lyme Fight, maybe exercise will leave my dream world and become part of my real world

Day 5 of Treatment 2018

Hi all, I hope you are all having a good symptom free week!

Today was my last day in Wichita at the clinic, I am all the way back home in my own bed now-very tired.
The doctors visit went well, not terribly exciting. The doc worked on my spine, neck, and muscles doing regular chiropractic work. I am prone to all sorts of spinal stuff because of my scoliosis, my KS  doc does a much better job at adjusting my back and making it last than any other chiropractor I've been to.
I was not given anymore supplements to take home on todays visit, praise the Lord. The doc did some testing on my thyroid and hormones but it all tested well. He gave me a few one time dose homeopathics to take in his office, but thats it.
In other words, today I checked out well and there was not a whole lot for me to have done. Loose ends are being tied up.

This was a great week. My doctor has me on a bunch of new supplements I have never tried before so I am very excited to see what kind of progress is made in the next few months.
My gut has been totally screwed up since March of last year. Whatever happened last March when I got sick during treatment has really stuck around in my body and hasn't let go. Anyone who has been following me this last year knows that the last several months have been the worst, maybe ever for me.
When everything went south last year my gut became problematic and my digestion was lacking. I was ready to just quit eating altogether at one point. It just hurt. I lost my mind for a while, it felt like decades. In reality I don't know when it started or when it ended, I just know that most of the time I am better now and I never get to the extremes I used to hit. Pain came back along with dizziness and extreme fatigue.
The last three visits to the clinic have mainly been to get my body floating in the right direction again. Each time brought more progress. This last week I think may have finally tied up the loose ends. My doctor found a lot with my gut and brain individually and my gut and brain together. Never had these kind of findings show up on the test before, so I think we may have finally dug through enough layers to reach some of the roots of why an atom bomb went off inside me and broke me in to a billion tiny pieces.
I am on new supplements that I have never tried, mostly for either detox in general or killing bad gut flora. My doctor said it could take a while for my gut to shift, as long as I don't get extremely worse I don't care how long it takes as long as I am moving in the right direction.

Post 100

Look at that you guys, we've reached post number 100!! During Lyme Disease Awareness month too!

This is exciting. I am thrilled to say I feel much better today than I did when I typed out post number 1 back in October 15'.
Today I am building up my body. My muscles and back are beginning to hold and work correctly, I have more energy, some nights I sleep hard and wake refreshed, and my spirit is healing.

One of the things you are never told about being chronically ill is your body and spirit are never in line. One day your spirit could be in a great place, calm and confident. But your body is in shambles.
Going to bed one night thinking everything is great, tomorrow will be awesome. Then tomorrow comes and you awaken to the feeling of negativity, pain, fatigue, and a grand total of zero motivation.

But time goes on. Gods plan works out. I have learned an invaluable amount of information during my many years of illness. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Did you see that coming?

I've been sick for years, but wouldn't have it any other way. Huh.

The end of my illness is getting closer, not tomorrow but in the upcoming time it is. Physically and mentally I am stronger and gaining a little more every week. Ups and downs occur but have become less extreme.

I will be going back to Hansa, I hope it will be my last requires visit. Even if it's not, I'm okay. If I go for a 4th time it is not the end of the world. I am healing. I will be 100% and better than before one day-without the need of further supplements.

That's one thing I am looking forward to, no more pills or liquids to take. I have a few boxes of empty bottles that I've saved just to see how many bottles I would go through to reach the last one.
I have taken something almost every day for 5ish years...it would be nice to have no need for that.
My healing results in the last few months is astounding, I pray everyone will one day be able to have access to healthcare that is available at the Hansa Center.

Until next time, God bless

Did You Miss me??

I'm back! With good news at that.

I did well on my trip, I was able to stay upright along with everyone else the entire time! Usually after something strenuous like travelling and doing activities I fall behind everyone else. I just cannot find the energy to keep up with everyone else, but this time I did it. Goal accomplished.

Last time I came home from a trip I had a huge symptom flair, felt like an entire relapse sort of flair. Doesn't seem to be happening this time, another goal accomplished.

I stayed on all my supplements and teas even. Only missed one day of tea. Better than what I expected of myself. Making tea isn't as simple as swallowing a pill....sooo if I just feel a little lazy that would be what I skip...but I didn't. Only missing one day is great.

I even exercised (on purpose) one day. I blame peer pressure for that.
I am what they call "exercise intolerant". If I exercise I feel worse and in pain afterwards. Like a while back when I thought it would be a great idea to bicycle for a mile.
They dragged me into the gym, first I found a place to read and stay out of the way. The gym equipment and people exercising however, were to distracting for my wandering mind.

So I just went for it. I picked a treadmill and just hopped on.
Started at .5 mph, not bad. Heart rate was 60BPM according to the treadmill sensor.
I slowly increased the pace, eventually working all the way up to 4.8MPH.
Impressively (to me at least) I did this for 25 minutes. I did a total of 3K and my heart rate rose all the way to 148BPM. The only major symptom I had while walking was my heart rate would drop every so often out of nowhere, which is normal for me.

Afterwards wasn't too bad, as usual I was dizzy and nauseas but nothing intolerable. All of the walking in one place for so long at that speed did mess up my balance afterwards...but it didn't last for terribly long.
I wish this was something I could do daily, but I have already proven to myself that my body-cannot handle it. Every few months I get the notion that I can finally start exercising, after a few days to a few weeks my body gives out. One day ill figure out how to resolve this.

During this trip I started reading Buhners co infection book on mycoplasma and bartonella, very good so far. I like how well everything is explained. I haven't gotten too far into the book yet...but I cannot wait until I have read the whole thing and get some new treatment ideas.

Even though this last week was the biggest reason for my Feel Better for Christmas Challenge I am not stopping. My goal is to feel as good as possible at Christmas and during the month of December.
I am going to call today day number 19, because the junk food is gone and I am back to juicing and blending smoothies!

I drank the glass and saved the rest for this evening :)

One last and final thing, it is slightly shocking (or at least to me). During this trip I was able to eat, I didn't feel like not eating. I actually had an appetite. I ate a load of junk but...I guess I have to start somewhere right??

Treatment Evaluation

I feel like its time to look at my protocol again(I do this often) now that I am trying to see how big of an impact I can have on my health before Christmas.

Supplements
Artermesia Combinations from Natures Sunshine, 2 pills 3x daily, 3 days on 4 off.
Cinchona bark tea, 1tsp of bark to make tea, I drink it once daily. Sometimes ill run water over it a second time and sip on it throughout the day.
NAC, Jarrow Formulas, 500mg twice daily. I had started at once daily but I feel like this is making a difference and I am not herxing.
ALA, Source Naturals, still 100mg 3x daily, I feel like it may be stronger now that I have added NAC
5-MTHF 2.5mg, once daily
Dopalift, half a capsule every morning, I haven't felt like this has done much. I tried going back to a full pill. Still kept me awake, not as bad as the first few times I took it but...im sticking to half
5 HTP Thrive, 1-2 pills every night. This is actually making a minor difference in sleep! Nothing has touched my insomnia in the last several years so this is impressive
 Liquid Cats Claw, 30 drops 3x daily. I originally started at 14 drops 3x, but it didn't seem to do much so I bumped up the dose. I may adjust it again later.
King Chlorella, 5 pills 3x daily, I restarted this instead of DMSA for the time being. Its a little more gentle and I already had the bottle.
Lugols Iodine, 1 drop at night with Cats Claw

I also take Calm magnesium a few times a week and L-Glutamine powder. I am supposed to take L-Glutamine twice daily, 1 tsp, but it turns off my appetite...so when I think about it I sneak it in a smoothie or protein shake.

Finished-Sublingual glutathione and black walnut. Since I am on both NAC and ALA I don't see a need to order more glutathione now that I've finished the bottle. NAC and ALA are precursors to glutathione, so it shouldn't have a big affect.

Diet-
1-2 juices and one protein shake daily is my goal, plus some kind of easy to digest animal product(broth mainly)
I am also looking for other whole foods to add to my daily diet.
*still a work in progress*

Exercise-
I have tried to do some kind of minor exercise since starting my Feel Good Challenge, not working in my favor so far..
Yesterday a game of catch the football tired me out, and today a short bike ride almost knocked me out(literally). Also a work in progress...I think I am going to down grade to just a pushup...LOL

To recap- Heavy metals and detox are covered to my liking. Lyme treatment is weak. Diet has a good start.
Exercise I may hold off on, I want to do something but I don't think my body can take it. My original thought is maybe if I try to exercise just a little maybe my body would start to uptake nutrients better since it will have more of a demand. Idk if this has merit or not.

Any recommendations are welcome!!

Busy Weekend!

Sorry I didn't really post over the weekend :/ I was super busy.

     Over the weekend I was out of town with some friends. Now that it is over, I am extremely tired...
During this trip I had about zero sleep. I was only gone two nights, so glad it wasn't more just for this reason!
The first night I stayed up the entire night, I probably dozed some but overall, I got up in the morning feeling the same as when I went to bed.
The second night I know I dozed some, no idea how much, I just know I did. Got up(notice I didn't say woke up) the second morning the same as the first. I stood up ad was just as awake as when I attempted to go to sleep.
This time, I know exactly why I am more tired than usual! I don't need to assume its associated with any of my particular infections. Not sure if that's good or not...but hey, its an answer, right?

    Overall the weekend was great, I didn't feel any worse than usual, even though I was awake for two days straight and had something to do the as soon as I got up right until I went to bed. That's a plus isn't it?
I had plenty of energy, I even helped push a dead car. Usually something like this would be very tiring for me, especially pushing something heavy like a car. Chronic illness absolutely kills muscle and endurance, making anything strenuous a thing of the past.
This wasn't even the most strenuous thing I did over the weekend, so I was rather impressed that I never felt worse!

     Because I was not at home, I couldn't take all of my supplements with me. The cinchona stayed home, so that was skipped for two days. I didn't feel worse, so it must not have been that detrimental.
I was already on break with the Artemisia, that I restarted today.
The only pills I took with me were Dopalift, black walnut, and FiveHTPThrive.
I wonder if the Dopalift helped me stay awake during the day? Its hard to say what is helping when I am taking so many things! That's one thing I don't care for about treating lyme, there is never just 1-2 things to take, it takes many supplements to kill off these bacteria!

Now that I am back home, away from other people, I can finally sleep! I was so tired this afternoon I fell asleep for about 30-45 minutes. I never do that. I crash in the afternoon if I am busy or stressed, but I never sleep. After this nap, I don't feel refreshed, I just feel the need for more! Ugh, the struggle.
Because I am so tired, I know this post has mistakes I missed, I apologize for that...

Until tomorrow, goodnight
Cinchona tea is calling me...

Past Treatments and a lot of Pills!

As you know, I have been treating my Lyme disease and co-infections for a few years. In my last post I said I was going to list all of my past, today is the day!
Most of the bottles I saved are herbs/supplements, but I have a few prescriptions like nystatin and doxycycline. Here it goes, its long...

For chelation-
3 bottles of Total Chelate by nutriwest, Started March 2015, 1 pill 3x daily, worked up to 2 pills 2x daily
2 bottles of DMSA Synergy from GS nutrients, 100mg 1 pill once daily, 3 days on 11 off(Doctors protocol)
2 bottles of King Chlorella from Nutricology, 10 pills spread throughout the day
2 bottles of DMSA from living supplements, followed the Cutler protocol, first bottle was 12.5mg, 1 pill every 4 hours, 3 days on, 4 off. I started this June 12, 2015, finished midnight September 5, 2015
A total of 560 pills

Probiotics-
Culturelle while I was taking Doxy, 1-2 daily, 180 pills
3 bottles of Body Biotics SBO's, I started at 1 two times a day, ended with 2-3 twice a day, started early 2015, finished May 24
Bowtrol Probiotics, 1 bottles, 2 daily, September 2015
2 Bottles Innate Flora 20-14, 2 per day(IIRC)
1 bottle NOW Probiotic-10,1 3x daily
1 bottle Biotics research S.Boulardii 2 daily
1 bottle Colon Plus also biotics 1tsp daily
=710 pills, not counting powder
I know a few of these are missing, I took more culturelle, another probiotic from Natures Sunshine, and at least 1 other. Plus I consume goat kefir and yogurt often(not pasteurized), but those don't count here

Vitamins-
Vitamin K2 from NOW, 4 bottles(from memory, only saved two), 600mcg daily, started early 2015, finished in June.
B-Complex, 1 daily, Metabolic Maintenance 1 Bottle, Started around August 2015, ended October 2015
5-MTHF Metabolic Maintenance, 1 bottle, 1 pill a day. Started with B-Complex, 2 bottles
Active B12 Folate, Prothera 1 pill a day, 3 bottles, started with Doxycycline
2 Bottles of Esther C, doses varied the ND had me doing 10g at one point, end of 2014/beginning of 2015
Active MTHF Complementary Prescriptions, 3 bottles, 1 pill a day.
1 bottle of Liposomal vitamin C, 3 pills a day, started in Oct.2015
1 bottle of CoQ10 from Metabolic Maintenance, 1 pill a day, Started with B-Comp.
2 bottles of Lithium Orotate. 1 bottle from Swanson and 1 from Advanced Research, 1 5mg pill a day, started after 1st hair test.
Custom Multivitamin Powder from Metabolic Maintenance, 1.5 tsp per day, 1 bottle, Started end of January 2015
3 bottles of NOW vitamin D-3, 10,000 IU per day, Started with K2
Calm Magnesium powder, 2 tsp per day, started with doxy, I only saved 2 bottles but I have continuously taken it since Aug.2013. I am going to estimate 6 bottles.
1 bottle of Green pastures Blue Ice Cod liver/butter oil, 8 per day, same as K2
There is definitely more, this is just what I coudld remember plus what I saved.
=2,350 pills not counting magnesium and vitamin powder!

Herbs(another big category!)
Grapefruit seed extract, nutribiotics, 3 per day(IIRC), 2 bottles
1 bottle of Swanson Grapefruit seed extract liquid, both of these were spring 2015
4 bottles of Swanson Milk thistle, 2 pills 3x daily, Started June 5, stopped end of Oct 2015
3 bottles of NOW Eleuthero capsules, 3 pills 3x daily, same as grapefruit seed extract
13 bottles of Swanson Andrographis Paniculata, 3 pills 3x daily, I started this early 2015
1 bottle of NOW Andrographis, same dose
2 bottles of Natures Sunshine Black Walnut, bottle one Aug., b.2 October 2015
2 bottles Artemisia Combinations, started 8/20 ended 9/5, 2015 B. 2 same as b2 black walnut
3 bottles of NOW Cats Claw, 3 pills 3 times a day, same as andrographis
2 bottles POA Phytolens, 2 pills 2x daily, 2015

2 bottles NOW black walnut/wormwood complex tincture, Feb. 2014
10bottles cryptolepis tincture from Montana Farmacy, first dose 15 drops, ended at 1/2 tsp 3x daily, started May , ended August. 2015
3 bottles Alchornea Cordifolia, 1/4 tsp, June-July 2015
1 bottles Sida Acuta 1/4 tsp, August-Sept.1
1 bottle Houttuynia tincture, Montana Farmacy, 1/4 tsp, June-July 2015
1 bottle Nutramedix Cumanda, started June 5
1 bottle Nutramedix Quina, started June 5
1 bottle Nutramedix Pinella started May 15
1 bottle Nutramedix Burbur started May 15

3 bottles of Biocidin from Bio Botanical Research, started around December 2014
2 bottles of Humaworm, bottle 1 January 2015, b.2 May 2015
1 bag of Houttuynia powder, I started at 1/4tsp and worked up to 1 tsp 3x daily, finished in Sept.15'

=2,270 pills, not counting liquids
This isn't counting the herbs I took first round with the ND for candida.

Other Misc. from the ND

Nutriwest-
1 bottle L-Glutamine
2 bottles methyl renew
2 bottles Total Cort
4 bottles DSF herbal
=630 pills

Metabolic Maintenance-
3 bottles Melatonin 9mg at night
3 bottles of L-Theanine
= 780

NOW-
2 bottles L-Ornithine 6 pills daily
1 bottle L-Theanine
2 bottles L-Arginine/Ornithine combo, 6 pills daily, 1 bottle 2014, 1 2015
=860 pills

Wellbrain-
2 bottles Adrestore
2 bottles Dopalift
=480 pills
1 bottle of Immuno gG from biotics research(idk when I took this, it was 2012)
2 bottles Sleep Deep from Dancing Willows, 2014
1 bottle Adrena Calm by Apex Energetics
= 100 pills

Other Misc.
4 bottles of Nystatin pills, 2 pills 2x per day
2-3 bottles Argentyn 23, 1 tsp 5x, 2014
Odorless garlic, 1,000 mg, 2014
4-5 Bottles Doxycycline, 4 liquid 1 pills, 100mg 2 times daily
= 580 pills

Homeopathics
4 bottles Ledum Palustre 30C. 5 pills 3x daily
1 bottle Boiron Silicea 30C
1 bottle Arnica Montana 30C
1 Bottle Calc.Phos. 6x
1 bottle Ruta Graveolens
1 bottle Calc.Phos 30X
2 bottles Mediral Rocky Mountain Spotted fever
1 bottle Physica Relax Milieu
=880 pills

This comes to a total of 9,160 pills!!! Except for 3 bottles(Artemisia, 5MTHF, and Dopalift), I didn't count anything I am taking currently. I didn't even count the liquids which includes the doxy and cryptolepis.
Almost 10,000 pills and I am still sick! This is just wrong. Most of these were in the last 1.5 years. What the heck.

 

I know some things aren't even included, like Dr.L had me take 3 rounds of mebendazole, 2 weeks each, and 2 rounds biltricide. IV drugs aren't counted. Essential oils weren't counted. And a few other miscellaneous things weren't counted. All of these have also been significant in my treatments.

Looking back, only a few of these were helpful. The cryptolepis tincture, DMSA, Ledum, and IV drugs made anything lasting. Houttuynia was also helpful, it was definitely killing something, I started at 1/4 tsp once a day and it made me feel horrible. I felt like I was going crazy. I would get this spacey feeling, I would become depressed at night, and I couldn't focus. It was one of the worst herxes I have ever had. The sad part is, idk if it gave me any lasting effects. It is traditionally used for Bartonella, which I have never been positive for. I decided to try it to see if bart would start showing up positive at the ND. Babesia never showed up until I started taking cryptolepis, I started taking it and I started testing positive on the bio machine. I thought the houttuynia would do the same for bart if I have it.


The ND has tried to push several of these products on me, especially several of the vitamins and Nutriwest. They are fine products, but they aren't what I need. What I need is to strengthen my body and get my body to kill the bacteria.
The probiotics definitely helped my stomach and candida. Before I tried the modified GAPS diet I had extremely high serotonin, which is made in the gut. After the diet and probiotics, its now too low actually. All of my neurotransmitters are low now. I will be making a post about this in the future. I just have to figure out....where did I put those test results...

In my next post I am going to highlight my current protocol and possible changes.

I wanted to right more...but it took about two hours to type all of this out.
 I.am.toast.

What is Chronic Fatigue?

This past week I have been totally out of it. I stay tired all of the time, but this has not been one of the better weeks.
One of the things I have sought an answer for is, why is fatigue so common?
Whenever someone gets sick, fatigue is one of the first symptoms. Why?

I don't have an answer for this one. My assumption is we feel fatigued from the body working overtime to fight infection. It seems to me fatigue should not be that hard to reverse. If we consume to the needed nutrients to support the organs, vitamin C for the adrenals, L-Glutamine for the stomach, probiotics for the intestines, and omega 3's for the heart and brain, the body should rebuild itself. Right? Obviously not, something is missing.

I have read through many threads on many forums, there are some people who practically supplement every nutrient the body could possibly need. Yet they still feel fatigued. Supporting the methylation process, the GAPS diet to rebuild the gut, and detoxification can all help...but its not all that common to for someone to say "I found that magic bullet that cured me". Don't get me wrong, all of these methods can be invaluable. The body needs all of these nutrients, sick or not.

     In my opinion, it looks almost like the body just doesn't use the food, supplements, medications, etc. that we provide well. Like the building blocks are there, the body just doesn't (or cant?) use them. I wonder why that is?

     Healing the stomach and intestines can certainly improve digestion and absorption. This can make a big difference for someone who has had
high doses of long-term antibiotics. Antibiotics kill the beneficial bacteria in the gut. These bacteria allow us to break down food sufficiently to be digested. Food that is not broken down enough cannot be absorbed and utilized. This would cause anorexia like symptoms even though the person is eating plenty.

     The fatigue, however, does not start after lyme treatment. The treatment can make it worse, but its not the cause. Fatigue is usually one of the first symptoms to appear, it was for me (along with insomnia.) but why?

What is there to curb this fatigue? I am still searching...